MICHELLE BELANGER

Take, Take, Take...

MARCH 23rd, 2016

By LANA CARBON

My entire life I have been curious about the paranormal. As I have written in previous entries, strange occurrences have happened to me which make me feel there are definitely things going on outside of the mundane world we recognize day by day. I believe (on a case-by-case basis) in the existence of spirits and people with psychic abilities. From a relatively young age I felt like I needed to learn as much as I could and by the time I started junior high school, had already started to collect divination tools, movies and quite the library on anything magical, mystical and supernatural. One part of my collection grew more quickly than perhaps all the rest combined, even though I didn’t even believe in their existence; I seemed to be enthralled by vampires.

The fascination began with the literary heavy hitters (Bram Stoker’s Dracula, Anne Rice’s Lestat de Lioncourt and John Polidori’s Lord Ruthven) but truly reached its peak watching them come to life (so to speak) on the big screen. Bela Lugosi, Christopher Lee, Max Schrek… each played the role so differently but all equally legendary for their characterizations of the immortal undead. 

Originally, vampires had none of the charm that fiction portrayed these creatures as possessing. Legend states that they were more like our modern zombies. Returning to a semblance of life to feed their never ending hunger for blood, these beings would return to wreak havoc on their families. In a less scientific time, folklore created these creatures as an answer to outbreaks of consumption.

Neither of these are the types of vampires that have inspired me to write this article however. No, that reason is a bit more personal.

Have you ever had one of those days where you are happy, energetic and just so full of life that you feel like you could do anything; and then you perhaps end up in a crowd and slowly you start to get a little tired, lethargic, or maybe even a little depressed and really have no idea why it may have happened? Sometimes a heated exchange with a co-worker or an intense emotional interaction can leave you feeling drained; but what if you don’t remember anyone saying or doing anything to change the way you were feeling. So, what could have possibly happened to impact you in such a way?

The answer could be that you were the victim of a psychic vampire. A psychic vampire is a living being that drains energy from their victims much like the legends say vampires drink blood. This exchange of energy actually happens every day with ordinary people but normally it is in a give and take scenario. With psychic vampires, there is only taking. But please don’t get too upset if someone does this to you; most of these people don’t even realize they are responsible for stealing your energy.

Is there a way to recognize one of these energy thieves? No… they aren’t necessarily the Goth kids dressed all in black, reading Byron or Poe and listening to Sisters of Mercy or Siouxsie and the Banshees… however they certainly could be. Although it is not an exact science, some of the traits to look for are a person who never seems satisfied, has low energy themselves (possibly even appearing fatigued), seeks constant reassurances and nurturing, and often maintains feelings of rejection or even abandonment.1

For years, I thought this might be me. In small groups, after a short ‘warming up’ period, I could allow my personality to come through. I was even a bit of a joker. I hoped that I could gain more approval by making those around me laugh. At larger gatherings, I was the wallflower. I felt that abandonment as my friends went to mingle with those outside my social circle. I withdrew from everyone and grew emotionally exhausted.

So as you can see, the attributes I listed earlier seemed to fit me to a ‘T’. It reached a point where I was actually noticing others seemingly losing their energy while I was around, as I began to feel a little better before slipping once more into the emotionally drained state I had been in prior to being in their company. Looking back, I wonder if this was the reason that I seemed subconsciously drawn to vampiric lore and if so, is it part of the reason that I recognized what was happening when so many others don’t realize the effect they have on the people around them.

For a while I even tried to embrace this lifestyle and thereby be able to control what I was doing. I had purchased Michelle Belanger’s Psychic Vampire Codex which demonstrated how relationships with willing energy donors would allow someone to master the energy manipulation. I actually even found someone that I trusted enough to explain my theory of what I believed I was at the time, and who accepted me for it. The result was not what the Codex had demonstrated, as the relationship quickly fell apart in a rather emotionally destructive manner. (To make it clear, I am not blaming Michelle Belanger or her book for this turn of events. It is a greatly informative read for anyone interested in energy work and I still highly recommend it.) 

I slipped back into that lethargic state. Not wanting to continue along this path, I started researching other means of boosting my own energy without taking it from others. Energy exists in everything after all. If I had to take it from another source then I could at least try to take it from somewhere else. Meditation seemed to help a little but it wasn’t until I met John, who is very adept at energy work, that things have started to turn around. She has been there to show me new techniques when it comes to collecting energy, to keep me in a more positive frame of mind in all aspects of my life and, most importantly, be that one person I know that I can trust to keep me balanced. It is NOT about the take, take, take… it is about sharing with others. As my partner in all areas of my life, she makes me capable of sharing myself with her. Using that same blueprint (obviously to a lesser degree), I can share myself with others thereby reconnecting with that healthy give and take flow of energy. I still have the occasional spell where I feel like I could fall back into that need for an energetic boost; but I fight hard against it and try to gain energy through other means. As they say, you have to take it one day at a time.